MAYBE THANK YOU ISN’T ENOUGH, GIVING COULD PART 2 By Onyebuchi Odianjo

MAYBE THANK YOU ISN’T ENOUGH, GIVING COULD  PART 2      

Onyebuchi Odianjo

Remember my article on the ‘empirical research on Lagos danfo drivers and conductors?’ Well, this is the second study I conducted which I found very interesting after implementing my ‘giving’ methodology. Although I encountered a street fight, moral lessons were drawn from the incident.      

   

This very day, I entered a bus from Ojota to Ojuelegba. Now, reader’s resident in Lagos who use public transport will

understand how comfortable the front seat of a bus can be, lucky for me; I got to sit in the front just beside the driver. The conductor said the charge was for 200 naira which I disagreed but offered 150 naira, just as I was speaking with the conductor, the driver said to me “baby that side na 200 oh!” I looked at him, batted my lashes and looked away.

He said to me again “baby girl, you don’t want to answer me?” then I said to him “please, I am not ‘baby girl’,” he laughed and apologised. A few minutes later, an ‘Alaye’ (roadside regulators) walked up to the driver and requested for some money, but the driver baulked. The Alaye stubbornly decided to stand in front of the bus and said he wouldn’t go anywhere if he didn’t get the money.

  

The driver came down to confront the Alaye and my oh my, what a huge man he was- the driver was a dark 6 foot plus plump guy. All of a sudden, the driver lifted up the Alaye in

the sky and did a spin like a WWE wrestle; I was so terrified. Surprisingly, the driver put him down, and they both began to laugh. Yes! They were only playing! Can you imagine?! “as in which kin play be that!?” like my Nigerian people would say. In the end, the driver gave him some money, got into the bus, and we started our journey.      

      

For some reason, the driver made sure I paid 150 naira making me the only passenger to pay a lesser amount, and I said the magic word ‘I thank.’ On our way, he said to me “Aunty I like your perfume,” lucky for him, I had one in my bag, so I gave it to him. The driver was so glad; he excitedly told his driver in vernacular “my girlfriend don give me perfume oh,”(meaning my girlfriend gave me a perfume), that made the conductor and some passengers giggle; after which he thanked me.

7:35PM-It was a cool evening, the bus was calm and to make it more perfect, the radio played some old school musicals; I was enjoying the ride. But then we got into traffic. As expected of a danfo driver, he tried to manipulate his way out. As he attempted to overtake the vehicle in front, the driver, unfortunately, brushed a black jeep beside him; just then, I knew that the traffic was going to get longer.

     

Suddenly, the driver of the jeep got down and looked at his vehicle, fortunately, the damage was not much at all. However, the driver of the jeep didn't seem to have a forgiving spirit as he walked up to our driver still sited in the bus and began to make a fuss.

As egoistic as men can be, our driver got defensive and said “oga your car no spoil now! Why are you shouting at me?”(meaning there was no damage to the car). Before we knew it, the jeep driver walked towards our driver sited in the bus and slapped him. Yes! A slap. So embarrassing; it took our driver about 20 seconds to realise what just happened.

Our driver's rage increased; he responded so angrily to the man “Oga, what is the meaning of that?” he asked, and the jeep driver kept giving an attitude like he had the right to have slapped him. Being that myself and the Danfo driver were chatting before the incident happened, I decided to plead with the driver to calm down, forget the matter and continue our journey so did some other passengers. But the moe i we did, the more i think his rage increased.  

Sadly, our plea didn’t help at all as our driver came down from the bus to face the challenge. Remember I mentioned what a hulk of a guy our driver was, and unfortunately, this troublesome jeep owner seemed to be in his late 50’s.  

You need to have seen the look in the old man’s eyes when he saw the height and size of our bus driver; the old man suddenly developed cold feet as he began to run around the bus while our driver ran after him for a fight. And all this was happening right in the middle of the traffic.

Thankfully, the family or probably friends (two ladies and one man) of the jeep owner were in the jeep when this happened, so they came to the rescue. This created a screen on the traffic because both vehicles blocked the way. After the rattle, we were able to get our driver back into the bus, and the jeep driver joined his family ‘unharmed’ thankfully.

I was pretty disappointed in our driver, although it didn’t matter, my countenance changed as I discontinued the chit-chat with him. He noticed and decided to speak to me, and

the conversion was quite touching as he said to me, “Aunty are you angry with me?” “Yes, I am!” I replied. “I’m truly sorry, I know you were pleading with me to calm down, but I couldn’t help it,” he said, “but why couldn’t you? Everyone in the bus pleaded!” I responded.

The driver went cold- “my sister, is it because I am a Danfo driver that he could slap me? How can a man just slap me as a grown man?” he asked. Then, there was this awkward silence for about 6 seconds; I was touched. At that point, I realised he was genuinely hurt.

What if he were a Mercedes Benz car owner, I guess things would have been different. So I calmed down, and encouraged him- “My brother, I understand how you feel, but sometimes you need to be calm, what if something bad had happened? Just try to be calm next time please” I said to him. I could see the driver was appreciative of my kind words, he even offered to drop me at my bus stop, but I declined.

This is a humanising true story with its climax and resolutions. And as usual, I learnt a few morals and made a few recommendations.

Moral lessons based on occurrence   

·  Be nice- remember when the driver called me “baby?” I wasn’t rude to him. I politely told him not to call me that, and in the end, I paid a lesser price than everyone. Always be nice.  

·   Be a giver- the driver paid me a compliment-“Aunty I like your perfume,” and he got a perfume in return. This probably is a reason why we were able to have a settle conversation after the heated fight.    

·     Never fuel trouble, try to quench it – although our plea didn’t calm the driver down at the heat of the fight, he felt remorseful in the end.  

· Don’t look for trouble (especially when you haven’t seen the size of the person [lol]) - It was funny how the old man showed cowardice after he was confronted with a fight he started. NEVER START A FIGHT.  

·  Never have a reason to look down on people- imagine again if the driver owned a Mercedez Benz, would the jeep driver have dared to slap him? I don’t think so. In all we do, the dignity of others should be considered; we all are humans irrespective of our social status and occupations.

· Always give right council – it’s imperative to be sensitive to other people’s emotions; it helps in giving positive advice.    

Conclusions

In summary, after using the ‘giving’ methodology, this study agrees with my first empirical observation which stated that danfo drivers and conductors aren’t always what they put up out there to be. Some of them genuinely could kind, polite and have emotions too.  

It’s best to be good; often, good begot good. Looking at the sequence of what happened in today’s danfo bus- the driver was kind to have allowed me to pay lesser than other passengers, after which I thanked him. Then he complimented my perfume, because of the good he had done, I gave him the perfume I had in my bag. In all- “may be thank you may isn’t enough, giving could.”

Stay tuned for my next empirical study on Lagos danfo driver and conductors.

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